Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Transitions

We are going through a rather traumatic transition this week as we are weening Persy away from swaddling and sleeping in her car seat to sleeping in a play pen with her arms free. In sounds like such a minor change, but 4 month babies really lack life perspective, (and new mothers sometimes too!) We decided it was necessary to stop swaddling because she is close to rolling over and we felt concerned about both the way that she was starting to inch out of the car seat and the danger of her rolling over and not having her arms free to push up and breathe in the middle of the night. I know that this is necessary, but it takes some serious conviction and stamina to keep calming Persy for hours on end as she makes this transition. Last night, I had to get up with her no less than 7 times in order to comfort her and put her Binky back in her mouth.

Seeing her so distressed also makes me feel like I'm doing something wrong. I constantly read, research, and question: Should I let her "cry it out" so she can learn to "self soothe"? How long should I let her cry before I comfort her and intervene? Will this be damaging to her emotionally? Should I ween her from the Binky as well? Should I let her go to bed with her silky blanket or will this pose a suffocation hazard in her crib? On, and on, and on. I realize that there is no "right" answer here, but I can't help but search in hopes of a solution. (I'd also LOVE to hear from any of you if you have good advice to give!)

It's interesting the Persy's transition should coincide with some of my own transitions. I can't help but think that I have a loving Heavenly Father who tries to ween me away from my own personal crutches and shakes His head to see me fuss over such minor changes. Being a parent has me constantly thinking of my own childish behaviors and tendencies and how the Lord is tirelessly trying to teach me and help me to refine myself. My daughter and I are growing together and I only hope that I can become the type of person that I want her to become.

10 comments:

Benson's said...

That is a tricky one. I really have no advice whatsoever. I can't hardly remember those stages with my kids sad huh? She looks beautiful in those pictures. She seems so old already:)

The Miller Family said...

Changes are always hard! Lucy has always loved to we swaddled too; my advice is to do a modified swaddle, just wrap her but not quite as tight, making sure that the blanket is clear from her face, if she decides to roll during the night the blanket will just unfold as she rolls. Also, if she loves the pacifier do not get rid of it, it is much easier to ween them off when they are two and can understand that the binky fairy is coming or that they are broken or whatever cute method you want to use. Good Luck!

Autumn said...

Oh the endless worries of motherhood. There is always something isn't there? Good luck with the transitions (these too seem neverending). I love to see all the pictures of Persy. Too cute!

Himni said...

Hang in there. I wish there was an easy answer; L was crying about being scared and ended up in my bed just last night, and she almost always sleeps in someone else's bed. We always wrapped newborns tightly, put them on whichever side helped them sleep better, and hoped for the best.

Kirsten said...

I found your blog through Jordan's. It's so fun to see some pics of your little girl.

CHARLIE!!! said...

I remember letting Jackson scream it out when I started putting him to bed in his own crib in his own room, for two weeks he screamed bloody murder and I all but cried every time I put him in there, finally though, he learned to go to sleep on his own and I can say that he isn't the least bit traumatized now!! It is hard to do things you know you should do when you know your little one doesn't like it!

CHARLIE!!! said...

Sorry that comment from "Charlie" is from Ericka...weird..I don't know how I am signed in with the name Charlie......

PixelFish said...

I just saw this book recommended. It might not work for all kids--nothing is one size fits all, specially when it comes to kids--but it seems like it's worth a try.

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0525949593/downandoutint-20

I saw it linked on Boing Boing where Cory Doctorow describes using it with his daughter, Poesy:

Basic method: for the first 8 weeks, keep track of when the kid feeds and sleeps. At 8 weeks, use this to come up with a sleep and feed schedule that more or less fits the rhythm she's falling into. Gently encourage her to stick to it (e.g., if she's hungry before mealtime, see if you can distract her for a few minutes [the first day], then a few minutes more [the next].)

Over a remarkably short period Poesy fell into a natural schedule that has her sleeping through the night almost every night -- even after we change timezones -- we've taken her to New York, Toronto, LA and Tokyo, and she's only eight months old! The impact on our lives was miraculous -- getting a full night's sleep every night has made us into better, happier, more attentive parents; and giving Poesy a good night's sleep every night has made her happier, more alert and more playful during the day.

PixelFish said...

Er. The book is called Twelve Hours' Sleep by Twelve Weeks Old: A Step-by-Step Plan for Baby Sleep Success, by Suzy Giordano.

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